I decided to pick up my guitar again after 10 + years. I'm trying to teach myself how to strum "rhythmically" which I seem to never have picked up on. I'm learning this song, "Thy Way Not Mine." I first became acquainted with the song from this album, "Looked Upon". A couple years ago, I had a big fascination with this song. Not because of the music, which is simple, but because of the lyrics.
In light of what God has done for us in Christ, every blessing on earth I experience really is undeserved. Food, family, friends, and relative ease of life are all blessings that I often take for granted. I actually do have this movie-life in my head that I don't experience on a daily basis. There are things I long for that I simply do not have and may never have. And I really have to be okay with that.
But I'm finding that at this time of the year, I'm really not okay with not having these things that I want.
I don't think I'm anyone special; I know that everyone lives with unfulfilled longings. It's just something about Christmas that makes them stand out more, even hurt more.
Two ways of thinking about unfulfilled longings: the song "Thy Way Not Mine" by Horatius Bonar, and "Dream Deferred" Langston Hughes.
What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?
—Langston Hughes
"Thy Way Not Mine"
Horatius Bonar, 1857
Thy way, not mine, O Lord,
However dark it be;
Lead me by Thine own hand,
Choose out the path for me.
Smooth let it be or rough,
It will be still the best;
Winding or straight, it leads
Right onward to Thy rest.
I dare not choose my lot;
I would not, if I might;
Choose Thou for me, my God,
So I shall walk aright.
Take Thou my cup, and it
With joy or sorrow fill,
As best to Thee may seem;
Choose Thou my good and ill.
Choose Thou for me my friends,
My sickness or my health;
Choose Thou my cares for me
My poverty or wealth.
The kingdom that I seek
Is Thine: so let the way
That leads to it be Thine,
Else I must surely stray.
Not mine, not mine the choice
In things or great or small;
Be Thou my Guide, my Strength
My Wisdom, and my All.
